Make new friends in Birmingham with Slow Social

Slow Social: a structured, affirming and sober space to make new friends in Birmingham

I've been reflecting recently on how many of the things I've created over the years have come from a very personal place. Across different careers and different chapters of my life, I've often returned to creating spaces that I needed myself.

A few years ago, when I was training as a therapist, I wrote about the idea of the shadow why, a concept I first came across in Laura Mae Northrup's book Radical Healership. Our why is our conscious purpose. It's shaped by our values and what matters to us. Our shadow why more subconscious and it's often driven by unmet needs or wounds that we might not even recognise.

I've been thinking about that a lot since launching Slow Social, a new event to support people to make new friends in Birmingham. Creating communities has been part of my work for years. My conscious why is rooted in a belief that connection matters. I want to create spaces where people feel welcome, included and able to show up as themselves. My shadow why is my own need for those spaces too.

When ‘traditional’ social events don’t quite hit the spot

Realising that I'm autistic and ADHD later in life has given me so much context for my needs around socalising. For years, I wondered why I found so many social situations exhausting. Put me in the middle of a networking event or a room where everyone is expected to mingle, and I'm definitely out of my comfort zone. I genuinely have a note on my phone called "small talk questions" for these moments.

Recently I've been wanting to expand my own social circle. As I looked around at what was available, I realised that nothing quite felt right. There were networking events when I wasn't looking for professional connections. There were noisy pub meetups that revolved around alcohol. There were large social groups that felt overwhelming. There were plenty of opportunities to be around people, but none felt like they were designed to help people actually connect.

So I stopped looking and created the thing I wished already existed.

Like speed dating, but for friendship, community and genuine human connection.

Slow Social is a monthly, sober, facilitated gathering for people who want to meet others in a way that feels calmer, more intentional and less awkward than traditional social events. It intended to be an identity affirming, inclusive space that’s open to everyone.

Rather than expecting people to navigate a room full of strangers, everyone moves through a series of structured conversations using thoughtful prompts. Some questions are all about reflection, others are light-hearted, but they're all designed to help conversations move beyond surface-level small talk. The format is as a bit like speed dating, but it’s for friendship, community and genuine human connection.

You don't need to be autistic, ADHD, introverted or socially anxious to enjoy Slow Social. Plenty of people just want a different way of meeting others; one that feels more human and a little bit slower. Plans for Future Slow Socials include walks, picnics, craft sessions and other shared activities that make connecting feel even more natural.

If you’re looking to make new friends in Birmingham and you’re looking for somewhere you can turn up on your own without feeling awkward, somewhere conversations have a little more depth and somewhere you don’t have to pretend to enjoy mingling, I'd love to welcome you into the space. You can check out what events we have coming up here.

As for who’s hosting the space, I'm Laura, a counsellor and therapist. My work brings together psychotherapy, embodied practices, meaningful connection, and nature-based experiences. You can explore my FAQs to find out a bit more about me and my values.